Wednesday, February 13, 2008
Miss the Old school
I dunnoe why but everytime I'm in this school, frustrations takes over me... If it weren't for Nat and Tse pin I'll be enveloped in boredom. ZZZZZZZZ
*Sigh* As some of u knows, I will always be thinking of something even if I am listening to teacher. Well... most of my thoughts are now concentrated on why I am always frustrated by my class.
Been thinking about it and found all the reasons. At most points, I felt like throwing a tantrum on my blog but every time I reach home to do so, some chattings on msn with my old mates and some other friends will cool me down thus gave a second thought of throwing a tantrum.
I'll not throw one now but just something i should write when i look back to the past in the future. People's been asking me to update so here it is. Here are some, if not all, of the reasons why I hate being in the current position that I am.
There's nobody to talk to about my feelings. Things that are personal... I tried approaching friends and slowly build up friendship but in the end it went to a different branch (i'll exlpain). Friends that are closest to me at the moment, Nat and Tse pin, are friends that are only suitable to make jokes with not share secrets or personal feelings. Unlike in primary school, i have a few friends that have the quality to be a good listener.
Shahid, jiawen and pearlin... We've been supporting each other most of the time till Primary ends. Shahid still being my close friend has been a "best friend" type and a good listener. That makes a really good friend. Nat's (no offence) friendship has nvr been anywhere close as ours. We understand each other very well thus being able to read each other minds.
In sec school whenever i tried to find a friend such as so, it'll either be going to another branch or just not a good listener. Like Tse pin, he's not the touchy type just the joking and academic type.
Ain almost became a good friend till i dunnoe what happen. I think she thinks i am too nerdy and uncool to talk to her. She then dun turn out to have good personality (a bit bitchy, no offence).
So now, secrets build up more and more... stressing for me as it does. In other words, loneliness.
Secondly, I've nvr feel appreciated for the things i do. i mean not that i wasn't appreciated but whatever i do turns old easily. Like i'm only appreciated if i make jokes and once i stop, nobody knows i exist. ok maybe i am appreciated in science but nobody really cares. Like for example the forum. The radio. My NAPFA test. i owned napfa like any years and expecially own Wei long . Only lasted a few days and poeple forget that i'm good at sports. The sports in this school sucks. Table tennis given bad reputation. so i didn't join any sports.
Wei long's only good at running long distance. He can't do 278 sit ups, 78 push up in a row, 51 chin ups in 30 sec, stretch, badminton, table tennis, swim, short distance running, long jump, soccer and basketball and he get all the glory. WHERE IS THE JUSTICE!!??
He only gets 19 for his napfa and me get 28 from chess and he get all the glory. This is not jeolosy, its just unfairness... Its like getting less than the marks ur suppose to get.
And i dun understand why poeple accept him as a friend. He's unsporting (he can prank poeple and when poeple prank him, he'll go emo), he's a damn flirter who has no limits to how much he flirts, he's a hypocrite (i was asking kim peng for her marks, wei long comes in and say i flirt. so i went away. when i turn around, he brought a chair, turn it around and flirt with kim peng!), very unoriginal ( copy other jokes like retarded waving, magic tricks just to flirt, and repeat a joke made by poeple to others who has not heard it from us) and get's other's into trouble cuz of his mistakes (like make noise and class will be scolded. when he was emo whole class was quiet thus noise was created by him - was also commented by mrs lim. got wei xuan into trouble in class and others in popular). Yea.. a list of things. so why the fuck everybody like him so much. I'm no the only one with this view.
i still have more to write like poeple out of the sudden not acknowledging me but i got to sleep so i'll continue someday...
~†hè ¤ R€†ÂRЙ~
10:03:00 PM
